Dirty Success

Chocolate Of The Week!!

Goes to……..

Ersher Baby!!
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Yummy!

All this musical genius, sexy, and chocolate wrapped up into one delicious man!

They call you U.S.H.E.R but I’ll call you D.A.D.D.Y!!

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A Lil’ Jokey Joke

A man asked a Chinese girl for her number.
She happily replied, “Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!”
He said, “Oh sh*t, Wow ok!”
Then her friend said, ” Calm down Tyrone! She means 666-3629.”

Ha!!

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Quick Tip

This Is For All My Men And My Girls With Girlfriends…..Pay Attention!

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I see and hear this all Too Many times!!

A lot of motherf*ckers talk a Great game about how they would put it down, can make you forget about your last dude (or girl) , make the p*ssy feel fabulous…. Blah blah blah. 

Until one day you fall for the sh*t and decide to give Tyrone some pum pum…. Only to find out he knew Nothing about pleasing a woman.
Now he nut and rolled over breathing hard like he beat it up (I can only hope you wasn’t oooh’n and ahh’n encouraging the foolishness) and you’re laying there pissed and still horny.

If this has ever happens to you….read on, if you have ever had to ask a women if she came, (you didn’t) read on……..

Women naturally desire sex that is passionate, sensual, and fulfilling. They want permission to be turned on…..

Still intrigued….Need to know how to get her to not only come back but call back?  Read on….


Disclosure: These rules apply for both intercourse and oral pleasure.

Rule #1. GO SLOW: Slow! Some dudes be flicking they tongue fast as sh*t all over the place while you moving your pelvis around trying to get a good angle for your clit… Smh. Go slow!! Slow so you can feel her, smell her, taste her, enjoy her.

2. BE SPONTANEOUS: Don’t Be Predictable!! (You never want your girl to already Know what’s coming next) Her orgasm responds to the elements of surprise. Just enjoy her body and the sexual chemistry you both share. Go with the flow. Whatever feels great to you will be even better for her.

3. HOLD: Don’t move! When you’ve come to that spot that makes her moan a little louder than other spots…. Stay there. Whether you’re giving her the D or the tongue. Stay there as long as possible so she can receive all the intense pleasure that’s available.

MAKE THESE GUIDELINES YOUR TECHNIQUE

And of course…. Have Fun!

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Chocolate Of The Week!!

This week goes to the Very Beautiful, the Oh So Very Talented Ms. Janelle Monae !!!!!
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And Yes she has a BODY TOO!! Yes Ma’am!!
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Chocolate Of The Week!

Goes To………… Mr. Chocolate Droppa himself…… Kevin Hart
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Funny, Handsome, Ambitious, Great Sense Of Humor, etc…… Yeah, He’s A Sexy Little Man!

So this week goes to you !!

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Game Time!

RED LIGHT/GREEN LIGHT (Adult Version)

The person in control will say Green Light when they want to be touched. Then they will begin to count down “20, 19, 18, 17….etc”  Once they reach zero say Red Light, the person touching must stop.

Then switch…..

The person touching will be able to touch the person counting in any way they desire. The objective is to get them to FORGET to count, thus prolonging the experience.

Game Tip: Don’t just use your hands. Use your whole body to touch your lover. This works to help you both win!

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A Lil’ Jokey Joke

What’s the difference between oral sex and anal sex?
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Oral sex makes your day, anal sex makes your hole weak!

Lmao!

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Chocolate Of The Week!!
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I know! I know! She’s not even Chocolate! But I Can and Will make an exception for Ms. Cyn Santana!!

Ugh! She’s so f*ckin sexy! Yes Baby! Muah! This week goes to you!

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And The Chocolate Of The Week Goes To?!?
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Mr. Idris Elba!! Another Gorgeous, Sussessful, Chocolate Man Aging BEAUTIFULLY!!!!!

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Game Time!!

Alright ladies, here’s a game for you to play with your man tonight.
We like to call this one “One Step Foward, One Step Back”
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Now, the instructions to the game is pretty simple.

Lay on your bed completely naked and have your man stand in the doorway of the bedroom. See how well he knows you. Ask him questions about yourself- It can range from sexual ( What’s your favorite position) to personal (What’s your favorite color)
For each question answered correctly, he is able to move one step closer to you and obviously if he answers wrong, he has to take that step back.
Once he answers enough questions to make it to the bed, give him his prize. (wink wink)
The teasing aspect and those steps taken away from you will get him turned on and eager to win this game!!
HAVE FUN WITH IT!!

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And The Chocolate Of The Week Goes To…..

Omari Hardwick
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I don’t even think he all the way qualifies as chocolate, but I can make an exception!
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Yes Lord, this man is a sexy somebody!

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Outside D*ck: Play Your Role…
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Now this one is for my Fellas! Sorry Ladies, (well maybe you can send hints to yours. =) )
Now fellas, I don’t know why you all think females don’t get tired of that SAME ass stroke game, with them SAME ass positions and the SAME ass approach to hit the kitty!
Spice It Up!
Act like a robber and take the kitty! In the middle of the night! I mean, choke a b*tch and all! Lol. But make sure your partner is aware of the possibility that she may be “raped” at mid night lol. Have a code word as well.

We all are aware of Kevin Hart’s hilarious code word, “Pineapples.” It doesn’t have to be that of course but create your own. Be Creative!! And have SAFE Fun!!!

And The Chocolate Of The Week Goes To……..
Serena Williams.
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Oh Yes, She Bad As F*ck!

The weather is getting Hot! And we know A lot of yall will be hittin up various places to keep Cool… But why not make cooling down more Satisfying…. Of Course I’m talking about Fuc*ing! Lmao! Here’s Ways To Ride The Wave!

Bubbly Back Float
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Floating gives you pelvic flexibility, so utilize that advantage. Experiment with it! Don’t be shy!

Leg Up

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You better bust it wide open b*tch!
With your dude between your legs, his pelvic bone rubs against your clit, giving you double the pleasure!

Hot Tub
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The space between you and your beau’s torsos allows the both of you to
watch what’s going down. There is also plenty of room to play, rub your clit as you grind. clitoral stimulation will only maximize the experience. Cum Hard Wit It!

Sea Horse
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Now I must say, this is one of my favorites! It allows Deep penetration and gives your dude the perfect view of your ass bouncing up and down at the same damn time. A Win Win!

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NTTMI QUICK SEX TIP
I Ain’t No Punta I Keep My Punanny Clean!
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What b*tch don’t like her p*ssy ate?? I’ll Wait…..
Well B*tch you might be waiting longer than expected if ya cooch aint up to par!
No man (or woman) wants to sip on dirty water. Make your partner want to do it.
You can start by making the pu*sy more appetizing.
Here’s a quick tip to make em want you to nut on that tongue.

First things first wash thoroughly! Lol
But for real for real.
Anywho,
Ladies, go to the grocery store buy fruits and berries. (Pineapple, strawberry and mango is my favorite)
This is for a sweeter tasting vagina. Eat as much as you want! The more you eat the sweeter ya juice. Don’t nobody want a tart puss.
Try It!!

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OMG What Are You Doing? That’s Not How You Suck A D*ck!

Practice Makes Perfect B*tches!

First Rule: Don’t think of it as a job. When done correctly, oral sex can be very satisfying for both of you.

Take control from time to time. Your man Loves it when you randomly walk up to him, pull his d*ck out, and get to work!

I’m not saying man handle his pack now…Start slowly and keep eye contact as you start moving your hand up and down his shaft. If you’d like, spit on it a little bit. It can make the act a little more kinky for him and help you and your hand actions go more smoothly. Its a win win lol.
Take your time on it. Use some of your senses. (FEEL, SIGHT, HEAR)
Feel his “transition”, Look at him and what your doing, make Noise. They like that slurping s*it. Lol These are a Plus!
Be his little freak! 🙂 Have Fun Damn It!

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Chocolate Of The Week!

Goes To….
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My throat is a little dry. Can I have some of your water? No no you can keep the bottle! lol….
I don’t know who you are but Thank You for This lol.
If you happen to see this hit #nowthatstmi up! We’d love to put a name to a Body!